February 24, 2005
Crash
...an old story
(operation#3, ...hardware X-ray, right tibia and fibula)
Here is a small example. When I used to motorcycle a lot, I called it a "moving meditation", because I developed that sense of always knowing what was going on around me, without thinking. Bikes are hard to see sometimes, and often when driving on a road with two lanes in my direction, I'd be in the left and a car in the right lane would come over into my lane. I usually KNEW this was going to happen. I'd calmy slow down, and let the car go infront of me. I got so in tune with what the other guys were doing, and felt so comfortable, that after a while, when I knew a car would be changing lanes right into me, I'd stay there, move towards the left shoulder, driving on a 6 inch strip. Then, I'd hit the gas a bit, let go with my right hand, lean over, and knock on the guys side window. It was all calm, comfortable, and I knew I was safe. It was most entertaining observing the drivers when they were startled by me at their window. It was like play.
There were a few other real accident avoidance scenarios, where the only thing that let me escape was that total focused calm. A knowing something was gonna happen, and then a instant calm focused reaction without thinking. The body just reacting perfectly, all by itself.
Exception - The one time I got run over by a truck, I knew it was going to happen, I had the brakes ready, but he came over SO fast (he was trying to avoid rear-ending a car in front of him), that my fingers didn't even start to squeeze the brake. I flew through the air about 75 feet, twirling around...seeing the sky, my pretzel of a bike, the sky, my bike, ... the whole time thinking... "Wow this is neat!, but my bike is trash, damn, ok, I'll get a new one. Hmm, when am I gonna land? Oh, ok, Im coming down now. There are the rear wheels of the truck and I'm about to land under them. Ok, arch, twist, yeah ok, cool! I landed against them, instead of under them. I'm laying in the street, all calm, thinking, Ok, I lost my bike, but that flight was a cool experience, and I'm fine. No problem. I get up on my left leg, and go to take a step, when I notice my right foot is hanging on by some skin and muscle, so I hop over to the curb, sit down holding my leg up. People start running over, and I'm still kind of calm, I start telling people what to do. "You. Call 911. You, can you get this helmet off of me? Thanks. Hey you guys, can you get my bike out of the road, its blocking traffic." Once everything seemed under control, only then did the pain start. But there was an element of "fun" again, when the EMS guys showed up with nitrous oxide.
I think the last story, was just a tad more than "nine" calmness and focused awareness, there was also, adrenaline, endorphins, and shock. But, I'll never forget knowing that that truck was coming for me. And I'll never forget the amusement I had while flying through the air.
If I didn't have this "knowing, calm, focusing" ability, I'd be dead 9 times over. That or be very bored. I really have too many stories like that. (not the crash) I had to promise my ex, that when we had kids, I would curtail pushing the edge, but she never understood how safe it all was. Or how "that" focused awarness was so, ...peaceful? Flow. Real flow. Not just going along with the whatever flow.
Its amazing how much sand and pebbles and road can get embedded deep into your skin, and how the rubber from tires can go in so deep that it takes a month and a half for the tattoo to disappear. Always ride with a leather jacket. (...and helmet!).
Posted by Ocean at February 24, 2005 01:35 AM